I am so excited to be releasing Cockroach Blueprint Redux with Melaris In Print by the fall! 400 new cockroach killing methodologies never before been published. For now, I will leave you with the poem that started this collection. Cover designs courtesy of Valisa Bernardino.
Hemingway's B & B Twilight approaches, in its company a weary spirit seeks a tear drops worth of welcomed solace. Hands no longer able to navigate this steering with wheel minimal visibility. I investigate the unworthy surreptitious road to find the bed and breakfast that holds my current reservation. Finally, a driveway, delightful slumber only a few kilometers in distance. What a wondrous sign to greet me, WELCOME TO THE HEMINGWAY! Immensely grateful to have finally arrived, not allowing myself to take notice of my surroundings only focused on my glorious king size bed with a walk-in en-suite jacuzzi tub to wash away this sense of darkness, trapped inside my own personal oubliette. The key given to me at the front desk, nearly breaks in the hole. I can’t believe it! For $200.00 per night one would expect a key that works. Clumsily searching for a light, my hands feel the uninvited texture of dust bunnies that coat the grooves of my finger tips. Disgusted! I recoil my hand until I grow enough courage to try again. Once illuminated my vision adjusts to finally take note of my glorious suite. Oh my great Goddess! What the hell is that? I approached with my fire engine red stilettos still adorned on my feet to find this tacky sea-foam green and indigo paisley wallpaper slowly moving. Unless the Tylenol ones I’d taken earlier to alleviate my migraine suddenly turned into a hallucinogenic? There, a dog eared piece of wallpaper begging to be torn & a healthy dose of dust & grime on the dark chocolate brown Berber carpet. My poor shoes, I'd just purchased them not a day ago & now they have a fresh blanket of god knows what happened to this suite's neglected floor. Racing back to my overnight bag, I found my large barreled curling iron it was all that I could quickly grab to ensure that I did not commit to touching the questionable wallpaper with my bare fingertips. COCKROACHES!!!! HOLY F*CK!!! Pleasantly consuming the glue that once adhered this tacky patterned fabric. Without a second thought, the stilettos came flying off, the wallpaper once again flat against the wall. I could hardly resist, slice, crunch, crack poor little impaled cockroaches find their doom as I go to the real Hemingway to finally relish the large, fluffy, warm bubbles I've so richly earned!